Outside of the NFL season I'm not much of a sports fan. Baseball is excruciatingly boring and lasts forever. NASCAR = cars driving in circles. The NBA is full of thugs and douche bags. And hockey? Do they still play that?
But there is one time of year that sucks me in with the force of a neutron star: March Madness
I've watched half of one game of college basketball this year. If I work it out right, I hope to watch over 30 games in the next five days.
This weekend is the perfect storm of sporting goodness. You've got little teams of saucer-eyed kids hoping to be Davey to the Goliath of the big-conference brute-squads on a national stage. You've got millions of alumni filling out brackets and channeling the school spirit of their youth. You've got emotional roller-coasters, clutch shots, tears, and fans storming the courts in reckless abandon. And best of all, if any one games sucks you've got at least three more to choose from.
I went to Gonzaga, and when I was there they...um...what's the word I'm looking for....SUCKED. The only reason I showed up was to cheer on a 6'10" house-mate and perennial benchwarmer, chanting "X! X! X!" at the top of my lungs in a feeble attempt to get him some playing time. (That was his nickname, and no, I cannot explain why) But they must have found some glass slippers after I graduated, because they've been keeping up with the big boys for years now. And now every year, like a moth to a flame, I'm sucked back in.
Of course last year they reached deep into my throat, grabbed my heart, and ripped it, still-beating, from my chest. I may need to have, "Thank You, Sir! May I Have Another!" tattooed to my ass if they do it again.
In any event, I'm taking my vitamins, doing morning calisthenics, and memorizing my brackets in preparation for this exquisite weekend, after which I can return to my normal surliness towards sports.
By the way, if you're not fired up about this weekend (e.g., either your team didn't make it or you're a hopeless loser) then my I recommend an alternative? Band Madness is also occurring, and your votes are required. Right now Cypress Hill and Bad Religion are neck-and-neck, although it looks like the Go-Go's are beating Rascall Flatts in a blow-out. I especially implore to help out Hall & Oates...they've got some tough odds against the Temptations...