Rarely is the question asked, is our children learning?

This weekend, in a desperate attempt to find something--anything--to do that didn't involve squishing Playdough into our carpets, we visiting Packer, a local private school, for their annual "Pumpkin Patch."

Our main objective was to give Cheeky a chance to cram toothpicks into apples and squirt paint onto spinning paper, but the excursion had an unexpected effect on me.

As we walked through the wood-paneled halls of what looked like Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, and stepped out into that rarest of Brooklyn spaces--a giant, leafy yard--I was caught up in images of Cheeky prancing down the halls, storing her lunch-pail in a little nook and learning from a caring teacher whose best friend isn't a talking monkey.

The snide egalitarian in me turned to Oodgie and sarcastically asked, "Doesn't pre-school cost $25,000 per year here?"

"No, pre-school is only $13,000 per year.  Kindergarten is $25,000."

To put things in perspective, the MBA program at Stanford is only $20,000 per year.

WTF??????????????????

There's absolutely nothing I value more than a quality education (not even nachos).  It's so blindingly obvious to me that having access to caring teachers in a safe, nurturing environment is the key to long-term success in life that I'm perpetually astounded and enraged that it's not an inalienable right of every child in America.  The sheer arrogance of schools espousing the values of personal growth and diversity but restricting admission to investment bankers and trust-fund babies turns me makes my head want to explode.

Metrodad wrote a thoughtful entry on this a few days ago (and curse you, Pierre, for yet again beating me to the punch on a topic I've been planning for a while) but he and I have somewhat different perspectives on this.  He went to a private school and is consciously electing to send his daughter to a public school, for a wealth of very good and noble reasons.  I'm a product of public schools, and although I came out freakin' great and have no real issue with sending Cheeky to one, I'm furious that in the eyes of the New York education establish I'm apparently an unwashed peasant, and I therefore have no choice.

I'm the first to admit that I'm a Marxist towards the 'elites' in our society, who (with a handful of notable exceptions) seem to be primarily skilled at being well-connected and making me want to punch them in the face.  And our neighborhood is full of them!  Everybody is sending their kids to one of the local private grade schools, which means all of Cheeky's "friends" will be heading off to places with the words "academy" and "institute" in the title while she's choosing between home ec and auto shop.  Meanwhile, we're hearing rumors that there may even be a waiting list for the local public school. 

We're looking into good Islamic schools just in case.

This whole thing has got me freaked out.  I feel like we have to plan years in advance, bringing cupcakes to kindergarten administrators and wearing a shtreimel to interviews to impress the faculty.  It's even raising the specter of moving to the suburbs just so we have a fighting chance of giving our child the education she deserves. 

I whole-heartedly agree with MD that this whole mess would be better if public school teachers were paid something remotely resembling their worth.  With all the money going into blowing other people up, I don't see that changing much in my lifetime, and certainly not before Cheeky's giving her valedictory speech at graduation.  I'll do whatever it takes within my admittedly limited power to give Cheeky the best possible educational opportunities, and to compensate for what she lacks at school with the some first class tutoring at home. 

It just infuriates me that it has to be this way. 

Anyone have any words of encouragement or, better yet, vouchers?

Comments

[F C]

Aaaaack! My wife and I are very much in denial about the upcoming education dilemma for our 11-month old. Sigh.

We now live 2 blocks from the Pumpkin Patch, but with the cost of sending the kid there, we might as well live in...Long Island.

[F C]

Nothing against LI, but we just signed our name in blood to D. Walentas for the right to live in a small shoebox next to the Pumpkin Patch.

[arwen]

Class wars start in pre-k. School is about socializing, she will be socializing with certain children and you, based on your wealth, will be contributing to learn how she socializes by choosing where she learns. You get to control how she learns about privilege. It's pretty fucked. We are experiencing it right now. She went from the best private preschool to public and the change isn't even a little subtle. We loved her pre-k and we love her first grade. The biggest change between the two environments aren't the children, kids are kids, it's the parents. Visit open houses of various schools and see which parents you like more.

[WCG]

Hummmmmmmmmmmmmmm..........
Considering the costs, is she going to learn any more than she does at home with you tutoring her (Outside of the fact that you need the break) and sending her to daycare for her social skills for a few hours a day and language class and music lessons? How long do you think you are going to stay where you are? Consider the costs. What you pay out now, you will not have for later.
(Wise words from former teacher and mother of 4 very bright and talented children.)
SMile :-)

[merseydotes]

A neighbor just forwarded us the e-flyer for his daughters' private school. It is between $8,000 and $16,000 per year for preschool (depending on your 'schedule option') and $19,000 for kindergarten. He has two kids at the school! I suppose it's flattering that he thinks we can afford it.

[keersten]

Frustrating, of course you can come on over to SLC, where vouchers on the ballot this fall...oh wait, you will still have to live in Utah. (Not that I don't love it, I do.)

[MetroDad]

Funny. We just met up with friends of ours in the playground last night. Their kid just started nursery school at Packer and loves it. Naturally, that made us rethink everything I wrote in my recent blog post. Packer doesn't seem as snobby as other private schools and their student body seems truly diverse (as opposed to other private schools whose definition of diversity is having a student body composed solely of uber-wealthy kids and poor scholarship ones.)

Luckily, we're blessed with good public elementary schools in the neighborhood. Yes, they're a little overcrowded but what public school isn't these days? I think the challenge will come in high school. Aside from schools like Stuvyestant or Bronx Science, there's such a huge dropoff in quality and most public high schools in NYC seem to suck.

I'm hoping things change but I'm not getting my hopes up.

But I'll tell you one thing...it'll be a cold day in hell before I ever move to the suburbs. I hear you have to DRIVE in those places!

[Amy]

Two words: Forest Hills. Not too far from the city, still semi-affordable, and good public schools.

[Kara]

As you know, we chose the private school route above the decent public schools in our leafy suburb. It all boils down to what's right for you and your family. Most people who think they can't afford private school would be surprised how much financial aid is available if you know where to look.

For us, it was the right call. Despite the fact that we'll never be able to retire, I don't regret a single cent we've spent on the kiddo's tuition.

[TheOtherCW]

Explosives are very pretty this time of year.

[landismom]

Well, we're firmly in the public school camp, but then again, I do live in 'the suburbs,' so yes, we all make compromises. I'd rather have my taxes pay for quality education for all kids, than have our personal wealth pay for a leg up for our own kids, personally.

[p-man]

School? You are asking about school? I'm still working on daycare.

All right, already. Mo is working & c.